Thursday, March 10, 2011

See: Karmic Retribution

My blogs about the magic of Match.com have sparked some memories in those that are nearest and dearest to me...check out the FB messages exchange between me and one of my middle school comrades, Sara:


Sara: So, after reading your recent blogs, I remembered an email I got about 11 years ago. It was too good to delete:

hey gurl!! whats up?!?!?!?!? my name is willie johnson and im from alabama. i have this friend named nittin in pensacola who told me about you. he said you were such a major babe and i wanna hook up. do u think you wanna be my online gurlfriend. well lemme tell you a little bit about my self so u can decide. my favorite color is purple and i have 12 brothers and 2 sisters. im 14 years old and my favorite tv show is saved by the bell (the new class). what kinda music do u listen to?? i really like the jackson 5. they are sooo awesome. well i guess yo should write me back and tell me about your self.. thanx for your time. really consider being my gurl. im totally cool and sexy.. bye. ~ willie johnson 

Me: I can't decide if my favorite part is asking you to be his online girlfriend, or that his favorite show is saved by the bell (the new class). Seriously, I'm crying though.



Sara: You seriously have no recollection of this?! You wrote this and sent it to me in 7th grade! I was like, "guys I got the weirdest email today!" and you started laughing and fessed up. The email address was williejojillie@hotmail.com.


Womp, womp. So, basically, all of these Match.com hijinks are merely karmic payback for what  I did to my dear friend Sara. (She still asked me to be in her wedding, but it wasn't to Willie.) You have to admit, the middle school me really knew how to write like a backwoods redneck. 


Sadly, I just might accept a date with Mr. Willie Jo Johnson at this point. I could handle a few marathons of Saved by the Bell (The New Class), right? Right?

8 comments:

Suzy Q said...

You had email as an eleven year old? So unfair you young thing you <3

Former Roomie Jules said...

Rednecks in Florida read so differently than the ones in TN. Even without Match.com, you have to get the bad ones to find the good ones!

Alyssa @ Life of bLyss said...

oh, gosh. that reminds me of some nice Facebook Messages I've had grace my inbox as of late:

"Zainal Dewji

hi Alyssa,
Do V know each other...No, V dont...I wish V did thou...i just saw yr profile & U seem like a very interesting person...so here I am, extending my hand for friendship all the way from DUBAI.

U & i = FRIENDS?

xx
Cheers,
Zee"

yup. would you like to use this for blog material, or shall I?

Sara :) said...

My favorite part was the sign off, "i'm totally cool and sexy.. bye."

i think i might add that to my email signature.

Haughty by Nature said...

Alyssa, you have GOT to write a blog about it! Creepy FB messages are even BETTER, because FB isn't a dating site!

Haughty by Nature said...

@ Sara...def do it. Then link to this post.

Haughty by Nature said...

@ Suzy Q Obviously, it was a tool I used for evil rather than good..

Kristen said...

BAHAHAHHAHAHA williejojillie. you're hilarious!

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