Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Sneezy the Friendly Dwarf

I love it when my blog touched people's lives. Or really, just when they realize they know the people in my pictures. My friend Erin emailed me this gem yesterday after reading my post:

Ensley.
I was just perusing your blog, and was joyfully reading and laughing and enjoying the photo-heavy post about your weekend.
 
Until I ran across this:
Who is you?
You see, I had a brief, yet unfortunate encounter with this guy/creature only moments before you danced with him.
 
Let's review the evening.
We went to Andrew Blairs (I, unwillingly) to see you, since you lured us under false pretenses (You said there were young, attractive men. You did not include DOUCHE in the description). We came. We laughed.  We left.
 
From there, our little group walked across the dimly-lit parking lot to Angry Ales, a fine establishment next door. We enjoy the scenery and settle into our confortable (yet approachable) circle of girls.
 
Enjoying polite conversation with our friends, I was distracted by a wiff of air that came protruding down my back and shoulder area. Turning around, I see a (small) male, smiling and wiping his nose. EXCUSE ME? You SNEEZED on me? I give him a look of disgust and turn around to share the mutual digust with my friends. I turn around again, and he is still there. STILL THERE.

Here's how the convo went:
Him: "I didn't really sneeze"
Me: "OK?"
Him: "I just wanted to talk to you"
Me: "What would you like me to say? Bless you?"
Him: "I mean, what do you expect a guy to say to a girl he's attracted to?"
Me: "How about we start with HELLO."
Him: "I mean, it's just a pick up line...."
Me: "Well let's file that one away as "NEVER USE AGAIN"
 
He continued to stand there and tried to talk to me. I continued to give him the cold (and now wet) shoulder. His friends used this opportunity to swoop in and try to use their friend's awkward entrance as a way for them to seem more normal. It did not work. After many minutes of awkward and forced conversation, they scooted along to Andrew Blairs, where the Sneezy Dwarf found his next victim: Ensley.
 
Hope your encounter was less germ-filled, my friend.

Aaaaaand we have a winner for Most Annoying Person Ever: Sneezy the Dwarf! I can't imagine how he wasn't the perfect gentleman, evidenced by his near-stupor in the picture above. Sigh. We do attract winners, don't we?

33 comments:

Christina said...

haha i love the blog world. one of my friends was at chickfila and the owner recognized him from my blog. he was rather embarrassed at first but then felt like a celeb. haha!

Alyssa @ Life of bLyss said...

HAHA. I may have said I'm lookin' for love, but please don't send that one my way. I like my shoulders dry.

Allison @ Happy Tales said...

HAAAAHAHAHA! That is hilarious. My my, the Charlotte creepers sure do get around...

shae majors said...

Shout out to Angry Ales!!!!!......as a server there, I can say Charlotte absolutely hands down needs to work on the manners that it's "gentlemen" have to offer....but there are a few sweethearts that pop up every so often!!!!

I do my best to keep the douchebags in line and often hear myself replying outloud, "I think your mother would be ashamed!"

(Ladies try that one next time your out....I love the various responses I get when I say it!!)

But seriously, this post literally almost made me pee my pants I was laughing so hard - too funny!

Thanks haughty for making my nights (and early mornings)!

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