Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Haute Reads: Why Men Love Bitches


Basic Premise: In 11 short chapters, WMLB promises to take you from “doormat to dreamgirl”, and learn to hold your own in a relationship. 


Listen, I used to be one of those single girls. The one wringing her worried hands, waiting for Prince Charming to show up on the doorstep. When frogs showed up instead of Charming himself, I told myself it was fine because I thought anything, anything was better than being alone.

Then I read this book. 

And I told that girl to shut the hell up.

In 245 pages, Sherry Argov boldy and hilariously told me everything I had been doing wrong (which was a lot) and exactly what to change in the future. (She’s totally Haughty by Nature!) She showed me that I'd been guilty of bending over backwards, being too available, and not putting a man in his place when he stepped over the line towards disrespect. And this was only in the first paragraph!

Sherry insists that she isn’t using the conventional definition of the word “bitch”. Instead, she defines a bitch as a woman who is kind, strong, and who won’t give up her life or chase a man. One who stands up for herself when he steps over the line.

Seems simple, right? It is. The book isn’t about changing who you are or becoming someone you’re not. It’s about learning to let a man earn you instead of chasing him. About realizing that being alone is better than settling. And knowing that, when you respect yourself above all else, he will as well.

So, I tried it. It was? Amazing.

I was getting phone calls for dinner dates instead of 3am texts. Doors were opened, chairs were pulled out. Once I got it into my mind that the only effort I needed to make was letting myself be chased, it was a freaking stampede.  I didn’t go out of my way-if I got a call or text while I was busy, I simply responded the next day. If I was asked out on a day that wasn’t good for me, I simply said so and offered no excuses or explanation.

I wasn’t playing hard to get, I was hard to get. I realized just how busy and full my life is, and was unwilling to change it to fit in a date or two. Instead, I let them work around my schedule.

Now I’m a different kind of single girl. One who holds her self-respect above all else. Who knows that being alone is a lot better than being with someone who doesn’t deserve her. And one who realizes dating can be fun, and not something to be dreaded on your way to Happily Ever After.

For the good of womankind, buy it for all those girlfriends who call and sob, "Why doesn't he LOVE me?" (This is even more effective than telling them to put their big girl panties on and deal.with.it.) Then tell them to read this, sit back, and enjoy. 

20 comments:

Suburban Princess said...

Love this! Sounds like the new The Rules - which I highly recommend...men need to chase a woman and like challenges and competition! More women should learn that.

Ensley said...

Yes! What a great comparison. I've read both, and WMLB seems a little bit more natural, with less effort on the woman's part.

Jet said...

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Allison @ Happy Tales said...

Okay so I just found this post and I had to comment because my mom gave me this book for Xmas 4 years ago!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I took it as a sign. Haaa! Anywho, too funny that you've read it, too!

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